"young girls should be supervised"
39 years old, born in Moldova, mother of twins, psychotherapist, worked as a model
The concept I had of beauty has changed over time. When I was younger as beauty counted mostly the exterior of someone, that is the symmetry of their face, full lips, big eyes, nice hair, good skin etc. However this perception has changed radically, as I grew older, into a different maximum. For me beauty now is an entire package of traits:a woman’s personality, what does she have to say, her humor,her education, her openess and sincerity as well as the sparkle in a woman´s eyes, the calmness and comfort that comes from her voice, the elegance of her movements, her personal unique fashion style.I strongly believe that we women are beautiful, if we truey believe that we are and that comes from our inner balance. This is exactly why, we women feel less attractive when stressed or unhappy.
Working as a model in my student days, has changed my vision over what is beauty in a woman: Everyone I’ve met was subjectively beautiful, but than you would quickly realise that lack of education (most of them wouldn’t even graduate from school) insecurity, hostility,arrogance, extreme competitivness are ugly traits that in fact turn some of these girls into not so attractive beings.
I like that I can eat all I want, whenever I want and I don’t gain weight. I have had the same 53 kg since I was a teenager, without any fluctuations, I didn’t get much weight even when pregnant with twins. My superfast metabolism I guess is a gift from nature, and I am very grateful for it.
Actually nothing. I am grateful for my genes.
It was always the same situation. You go to a casting. And they look for one girl. Just one. So you meet a lot of very beautiful women and you wonder what the standard of beauty really is. Yes, there is a particular request of the client, but virtually all those girls can meet those standards. Therefore, lots of the young girls I’ve met were very insecure, preoccupied with their already perfect exterior.
Did you also deal with insecurities in that time?
No, not really. I was always seeing this job only as a way of making money during my student times, that was easier than being a waitress or saleswoman. I never wanted to make a career out of it, and my University classes were always the priority. I was a student, not a model and I guess that thought protected me from entering the competitive game.
It sometimes happens that other women try to “protect“ their husbands from my presence. For example I am at the playground with my two sons and there is a daddy with his kids, we start a conversation because our kids play together and out of nowhere there will show up his absolutely pissed of wife, rushing him and the kid to leave that very moment. It´s quite offending for me because it doesn´t mean when you are beautiful that you are there to hunt everybody´s husband. It is disrespectful.
It influences especially young people with unformed personalities. Girls want to be like the girls they see on the pictures, which are not real. They start to feel unhappy because they can’t possibly achieve those standards. In France there is this movement now and they want to ban photoshop and not allow models on catwalks that do not weigh enough.I very much support this. Photoshop should be baned. Acne is not a big deal. We all went through that in our teens. It´s okay.
The fashion industry has a big influence and young girls should be supervised by their mothers or by school in how they perceive it. Somebody has to explain it to them, that fashion is about individuality more than about being skinny and model looking.
What is more important than caring about being beautiful?
To aquire the ability to love. Fall in love with a man, make him your man, to fall in love with a person and make them your friend, fall in love with your kids later when you have some, fall in love with a craft and make that your job, love your daily life and if you don’t, change it in ways that would make you love it. Everything else but external beauty, that unfortunately fades as we grow older.
What is your advice to young girls?
Find and nourish your uniqness, that is what defines you as beautiful.